Think You Can’t Foster? Real Stories for Common Concerns

We know that making the decision to become a foster carer isn’t one that you make on a whim. That’s why at Compass we make sure to give everyone a chance to come into assessment with us as long as they meet our main requirements.

Being a foster carer isn’t about being the perfect person or parent, and we won’t expect you to superhuman (but we’ll see you as a superhero!)

We spoke to some of our brilliant foster parents to hear about their first-hand experience when they thought that they might not have made it to being a carer with us. Take a look at their fostering stories below:

Our amazing 17-year-old foster daughter has been with us for over 6 months now, she recently turned 18, so we have now switched to a Staying Put placement & as she’s going to university later this year, we will provide supported lodgings for the duration of her studies, so that she knows she has our family support & can return home to us whenever she wants to at weekends & during the university holidays. There is no doubt that our placement together was meant to be!

When foster carers Alicia and James began their fostering journey, they felt that they would be out of their depth by fostering teenagers, as they had never raised children of their own.

The couple said they would like to look after young children. With many IFAs, the couple would be told to connect with a Local Authority as they find families for mostly young children.

We listened to the two of them, their views, their worries, and their questions and worked with them to review their ideals. One of our Compass Carer Support Champions helped the couple to consider a range of other factors like specific needs and circumstances of each child before deciding on suitability of the young people they’d be looking after. “We are so happy that we looked at every aspect of looking after a young person rather than only focusing on physical age!”

“There is no doubt that our placement together was meant to be!”

“Our amazing 17-year-old foster daughter has been with us for over 6 months now, she recently turned 18, so we have now switched to a Staying Put placement and as she’s going to university later this year, she knows she has our family support & can return home to us whenever she wants to at weekends & during the university holidays.”

Matthew and Daryl both worked full time before they became foster carers. Generally speaking, because of this they would have been screened out of the assessment process much earlier if we didn’t see their potential to change a child’s life. “Our Fostering journey began back in January 2020 when friends of ours put us in touch with Compass and suggested we give them a call and show our interest. Within 2 weeks we met our assessment social worker Chelsea, and it all went from there.”

3 months after being approved following our rigorous assessment process, Matt and Daryl got the call every foster carer is expecting: their first long term foster child needed our help, and they were ready.

Many people asked the couple how they would juggle their busy full time working lives around a child. “Our simple answer to them all was, “if the rest of the world can do it, then so can we! You do find yourself thinking “can this work?” You adjust your lifestyle and make changes here and there until it works. 9 months later we absolutely love being foster parents and feel like our child has always been here.”

“Being a same sex couple made no difference in the slightest to whether we would be successful foster parents or not. In fact, it made us even more determined to show others that we could do it.”

Many LGBT+ couples are hesitant to apply to become foster carers, worrying that they will face unfair judgement or prejudice. At Compass we want to make everyone feel valued and welcome, that’s why we ensure that we provided extra support to our foster carers, staff, and foster carers during their application process with us through New Family Social.

“We’ve had amazing support from our families and friends, each and every one of them have all said what a wonderful little family we all make and what an amazing difference we are both making to our child’s upbringing.”

Compass South knew Anna and Piotr had a lot of potential to foster and care for children and young people, having both experienced the challenge and trauma of leaving their homes and families; something that the children in our care are only too familiar with.

Since their approval as foster carers, they have gone on to welcome a young person into their home – thank you Anna and Piotr for providing a safe and loving home!

Anna & Piotr spoke about  their Fostering Journey;

‘We had no concerns through the process and felt the staff at Compass were helpful in answering all of our questions. We were well supported through panel, and this wasn’t as daunting as we thought it would be.”

When Kirsty and Jessica applied to foster with Compass North they had little childcare experience, alongside this Kirsty had some historical health concerns, however Compass saw the potential they both had, looking at their transferrable skills gained from previous employment that they have now been able to introduce into their fostering role.

Since they registered just over two years ago,  the couple have welcomed two children into their home; one for over 12 months – thank you Kirsty and Jessica for providing a safe and loving home.

Safina and Suliman exemplify our Potential, Not Perfection motto, having been encouraged by our recruitment team to take the leap into fostering. Overcoming personal hurdles and drawing on their experiences, they embraced the recruitment process with determination. With thorough training and support, they broadened their knowledge of fostering and connected with other foster carers in their area.

Now, Safina and Suliman have warmly welcomed two siblings into their home, making a lasting difference in their lives.

Compass Central knew that Amyan and Adam had potential from the very start of their journey.

Despite having limited experience looking after children, they did not let this deter them, and sought guidance before applying via a close friend, who is also an experienced Compass Foster Carer.

Amyan and Adam have overcome some hurdles in their past together, as a team, and were open and willing to work closely with our family finding team, where they now continue to care for a sibling group of three children.

‘’Our fostering journey began back in 2020, while both working full time in the travel and retail sector. We knew that fostering young people was going to be a part of our future. However, we didn’t know how this would look or where to even begin. Neither of us had children of our own or much experience working with young people. We were fortunate enough to have a close family friend that fostered for Compass and later referred us to the agency. While we would tell anyone the application process is not for the faint hearted, it definitely allows you to reflect on your own life and what qualities you might bring to fostering.

Fast forward five short months later, we were fully approved foster carers. After some careful consideration and research, we decided it would be best for us to start by providing short term respite for fellow carers. The first children we welcomed into our home for a weekend of respite, was a young sibling group of three, yes three! We certainly felt like we jumped in at the deep end. I will never forget that moment at the end of the first day saying “we did it”, then thinking, maybe we could do this full time. The respite became a regular occurrence, until one day we made the decision to accept a long term placement.

Fast forward to today and we’ve had our current placement of siblings for nearly three years. Again, I would never tell anyone it’s all plain sailing, but the rewards are unlike anything you could experience, and this is coming from two people that travelled the world for a living. The most beautiful part of fostering is the journey you never expected to have. While we can’t guarantee that everyone will have the same experience as us, we can bet it will be as equally rewarding.’’

Thank you, Adam, and Amyan for making such a positive difference.

Kim and Fred are Compass East Carers who had previously enquired about Fostering with another organisation,

As a couple, they had overcome a number of challenges in their past, and by working together in the recruitment process, they demonstrated their resilience, and we saw their potential to make fantastic foster carers

It is great to see Kim and Fred now caring for 2 siblings who otherwise could have been separated.

Thank you, Kim and Fred, for making such a positive impact in your journey as Foster Carers.

‘As new foster carers we have found it to be a fascinating rollercoaster journey. It’s hard work with definite highs and lows, but I wouldn’t be doing anything else. We know that we are making a difference to these children and hopefully contributing to a brighter future for them.

It can be really frustrating at times but focusing on the children helps me to deal with what’s important and what isn’t. The children need love, time and nurturing, and that is what we concentrate on whilst everything else is happening around them. We don’t know their future, so the present is what we deal with.’’

As an Independent Fostering Agency, we never want to be too quick to judge. We have a detailed and rigorous assessment process that is in place, so our young people are well looked after and safe with our foster families. So many people have the ability and drive to work around the kinds of barriers that could be in place, and Compass can help them on the way and be as accommodating as we can.

Compass saw the potential in Sally from our very first contact.

Looking past Sally’s physical health concerns, we explored her previous experiences working with children, to see that Sally has fantastic qualities, to make a difference to a vulnerable child’s life.

Sally has gone on to work closely with our family finding team to welcome a number of children into her home.

Thank you, Sally – here’s what she had to say;

‘’ Becoming a foster carer has been one of the best decisions I have ever made, I love children and have worked in a nursery setting for nearly 10 years, I have 2 daughters who are now grown up and was looking for a new challenge and fostering has really fit the bill! I have had 2 children on respite and have currently got a little boy with me, he is nearly 3. I am amazed at how much he has developed in such a short space of time. He is happy, confident and a little cheeky. It has been an honour to start my journey with him and with Compass. It has been a rollercoaster but one I am happy to go on again and again.’’

As an Independent Fostering Agency, we never want to be too quick to judge. We have a detailed and rigorous assessment process that is in place, so our young people are well looked after and safe with our foster families. So many people have the ability and drive to work around the kinds of barriers that could be in place, and Compass can help them on the way and be as accommodating as we can.

Compass saw the potential in Leanne and Mark to become great foster carers, and although both carers have overcome some prior hurdles with regards to their health, with support and training joined the West Compass team.

Thank you Mark and Leanne, for helping to make lasting differences to many children’s life’s.

‘’ I have been fostering with compass for over 5 years now and never have I felt so supported in my job, after many years I finally found my perfect job! I have a great relationship with all that I have worked with in Compass and look forward to many more fantastic years to come. My only regret is that I didn’t start working for compass 10 years ago.  ‘’

As an Independent Fostering Agency, we never want to be too quick to judge. We have a detailed and rigorous assessment process that is in place, so our young people are well looked after and safe with our foster families. So many people have the ability and drive to work around the kinds of barriers that could be in place, and Compass can help them on the way and be as accommodating as we can.

When Leon and Karl first applied to foster with Compass North, they had little to no experience caring for children or young people — but what they did have was a huge amount of heart and a genuine desire to make a difference.

Their journey wasn’t without its challenges. During the assessment process, some medical queries came up that needed further exploration. But instead of backing down, Leon and Karl faced everything head-on with determination and resilience. They stayed committed, worked hand-in-hand with the Compass team, and went above and beyond to provide whatever was needed — never losing sight of their goal: to open their home and hearts to children who need it most.

Today, they’re proud and approved foster carers, offering safety, love, and stability to a sibling group — keeping brothers and sisters together in a warm, nurturing home.

Leon and Karl, your dedication, strength, and compassion are truly inspiring. Thank you for stepping forward and changing lives in the most powerful way.

‘The process of becoming a foster carer was challenging and we had to take a short break from the process due to a family bereavement. However, we always knew we were going to continue as we knew we wanted to offer a safe and loving home to potential foster children. 

Working closely with our SSW who is fantastic, and the family finding team we took our time to find the right match. After around 3 months we were sent a referral for the 2 wonderful boys we currently have in our care. 

 We are now nearly 4 months into our fostering journey, and we feel so lucky to have these boys in our lives. We’ve seen such a huge change in them in such a short time. It’s been challenging at times but through the help, support and guidance of our SSW and the training that’s been given through Compass we’ve managed to navigate these challenges and provide a therapeutic environment for our boys.

 I’d also like to add that both Karl and I still work. I wanted to mention this as I don’t want people to think this would be a barrier to becoming a foster carer, although it does come with other challenges.’

As an Independent Fostering Agency, we never want to be too quick to judge. We have a detailed and rigorous assessment process that is in place, so our young people are well looked after and safe with our foster families. So many people have the ability and drive to work around the kinds of barriers that could be in place, and Compass can help them on the way and be as accommodating as we can.